LLOYD, THE FATHER OF MY CHILDREN JUNE 21. 2010

Yesterday was Father's day and I honored my father. Today, my focus is on Lloyd and the good father and husband that he was and is. Who would have thought that I would miss his snoring, his peculiarities, and his perfectionism! The answer is that I would, and as a result relished the last few years of all the above! Truly it sounds unbeleivable, but thinking back, I know that my inner knowing or spirit DID know! It was as if the Holy Ghost was letting me know that his life was going to be called short and to enjoy him in all aspects of his life! I am so greatful that I did, because having him snoring loudly by my side meant he was there for me in my life. If and when I dared complain about his snoring, it offended him deeply, so the last few years I just kept quiet and only would tell him how I enjoyed him sleeping next to me--snoring or not!! (It was the truth!!)
For his funeral, I spent many hours calling his friends and business associates because I wanted him to be honored and to see how everyone loved him! I knew his spirit would know!! It was neat over the past few years to read the special notes and remembrances of him that were given me. They truly became a tribute to his life and are kept to be put into a book about him.
It is weird how many things in life are so trivial and meaningless. When someone near and dear dies, all perception and priorities change a little. Thinking back, there were so many messages given me that his life would be cut short, but it is hard even still to comprehend how abrupt and dramatic those changes will be. Sometimes I wish for a little more time, a little more privacy with him to talk and reflect, but it was and is not meant to be. I think that there will be much time during the millinium to bring things better toward perfection and the true love of Christ into our marriage. There are so many things for me to improve upon and learn. It might seem weird, but I still relish reading all parenting and marriage talks and books because someday I will be reunited to and a spouse to Lloyd for eternity!! I want to be the very best mother and wife that I can be! So many mistakes have and are made by me in this earthly existence! The neat thing is that it is never too late!!!! Never to late to make changes and be and do better! The sad thing is that we cannot undo the mistakes and imperfections of past, but we CAN start where we are and climb higher, try harder, and be the very best we can be in making amends for the rest of life.
Now I will reprint the copy of the good qualities of Lloyd that I put together not long after his death. There are imperfections in the typing and organizing of words and thoughts, but the true love and feeling of adoration are there and I hope you can feel it!!!!!
LLOYD'S ASSETS; KEPT THINGS ALWAYS IN GOOD WORKING ORDER, DID ALL HIS RELIGOUS CALLINGS WITH GUSTO AND LOVE, ALWAYS READ HIS SCRIPTURES DAILY, IN EMERGENCIES HE ALWAYS KEPT HIS COOL AND KNEW WHAT TO DO, ALWAYS FASTED ON FAST DAY, ALWAYS KEPT THE YARDS LOOKINGNICE, ALWAYS KEPT THE CARS CLEAN AND IN GOOD WORKING ORDER, ALWAYS FIXED THINGS WHEN THEY NEEDED FIXING OR CHANGING, PUT HIS ALL INTO HIS WORK AND DID IT IN A PROFESSIONAL AND
PERFECT WAY, WAS A GOOD PROVIDER, KEPT HIMSELF CLEAN AND NEAT AT ALL TIMES, WAS GOOD AT STICKING TO ORGANIZED SYSTEMS OF DOING THINGS, ALWAYS LOOKED AFTER HIS CLOTHES AND BELONGINGS BY KEEPING THEM IN THEIR PLACE,WAS ORDERLY, WAS THRIFTY WITH MONEY, DIDN'T ALLOW US TO GET IN DEBT, HANDLED SITUATIONS THAT WERE DIFFICULT FOR ME, WAS ALWAYS A GENTLEMAN WITH ME - OPENING DOORS,- MOVING HEAVY THINGS ETC.,-TOOK MEOUT ONFRIDAY NIGHT DATES, HELPED ME WITH HOUSEWORK WHEN I NEEDED IT, PAID THE BILLS AND DID THE CHECKBOOK, READ THE PAPER AND KEPT UP WITH THE NEWS AND SPORTS, WAS INTERESTING TO TALK WITH,TOOK ME TO THE TEMPLE AND WENT AS OFTEN AS HE WAS ABLE, LOVED PEOPLE AND WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR THEM,KNEW HOW TO THINK PROBLEMS THROUGH, ATTENDED ALL CHURCH MEETINGS AND CONFERENCE, WAS ALWAYS ON TIME TO ANY APPOINTMENTS, ALWAYS PAID HIS TITHING, WENT TO THE CHILDREN'S SPORTS EVENTS AND OTHER ACTIVITIES, SHARED THE BOYS INTERESTS WITH THEM, AND GIRLS INTERESTS AS MUCH AS HE COULD BEING A MALE,TOOK ME TO CULTURAL EVENTS AND LIKE TO PARTICIPATE IN CULTURAL EXPERIENCES, LIKED TO LAUGH, TRIED TO KEEP HIS WEIGHT DOWN, WAS VERY SOCIAL WITH ALL, SHARED THE GOSPEL WITH OTHERS, WAS GOOD AT KEEPING THE DOGS AND YARD FLEA AND TICK FREE, KEPT A SUPPLY OF WOOD ALWAYS AVAILABLE FOR MY FIRE PLACE, WAS HONEST, HAD INTEGRITY IN ALL ASPECTS OF HIS LIFE, WORKED ON GENEOLOGY, LOVED HIS PARENTS, KEPT THE WORD OF WISDOM,NOTICED THE BEAUTIES OF NATURE AND OFTEN SHARED BEAUTY OFNATURE WITH ME, SAID HIS PRAYERS MORNING AND NIGHT AND TOGETHER WITH ME AND TOGETHER AS A FAMILY, ALWAYS DID HIS HOME TEACHING AND LOVED IT, ALLOWED ME MY FREEDOM, TOOK ME PLACES WHEN I NEEDED HIM THERE, WAS A GOOD MISSIONARY, ALWAYS CARED FOR OTHERS AND THEIR NEEDS AND WOULD ALWAYS BE ON THE LOOKOUT TO HELP OTHERS,WAS TENDER HEARTED WHEN IT CAME TO ANIMALS OR OTHERS, HE HUGGED, KISSED ME AND TOLD ME HE LOVED ME, HE WOULD OFTEN CALL ME DURING THE DAY JUST TO CONNECT, WE HAD PLAYFUL FUN TIMES TOGETHER EVEN SOMETIMES DANCING IN THE FAMILY ROOM, AND HE LOVED HIS FAMILY AND WOULD OFTEN BRAG ABOUT EACH OF THEM TO OTHERS! I love you, Lloyd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THERE WERE MANY MORE THINGS BUT THAT IS ALL FOR NOW. (I presented this to Lloyd a number of years before his death and then framed it for him. That is one of blessing of listening to the Holy Ghost and following the promptings before it is too late!) BUT, IT IS NEVER TOO LATE!!!!